Sorry I haven't written for a while. It's been a hell of a two weeks since I cracked my ribs. I couldn't sit up for long periods of time and I couldn't write for long periods.
In fact I've become a couch potato and for the life of me I do not see how people can do this without becoming insane. The dishes call to me, "Clean Me," so pitifully, the dust bunnies are getting names, the bottom of my walls look like modern art with the mud smears from Mischief's tail.
MM and Catie get very frustrated that I get up and try to do these things but I'm in a catch-22. If I don't try to get up and move, then the Fibromyalgia will freeze me up and make me bedridden and if I get up too much the ribs are yelling at me that they plan on going on strike or mad dwarfs start playing xylophone symphonies on them with hammers. It doesn't help that Catie has Strep.
She was supposed to be moving out August 1 to a house with a group of friends but poor her, the people in the house need more time to move so she has to stay home an extra month. (Yahoo! but don't tell her that. I really wasn't looking forward to a Catie free house.)
One occasion I had to get up for was the Family BBQ to welcome MM's Aunt Joan to Ottawa from BC. I've always loved her visits and I love seeing MM's family because they are amazing people and it's a weird difference from when we first met. (Nothing to do with all those big gorgeous men to hug, honest!) MM hates going to these things alone and he prefers I come as he says he likes showing me off. (I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that I'm the one that remembers all the family names of nieces, nephews, hobbies, taste preferences, jobs etc...)
I understand that because I love bringing Catie, Breyan and the girls out because I'm so proud of them. Yeah I know, other people show off their new cars and careers and I show off my kids but they take just as much work without the promotions and none of the health benefits. I get paid in hugs, kisses, and "Love you Nona," but to me that means more than any new truck or nameplate on the door.
Anyway, we got to see Aunt Joan who I think is an amazingly strong woman, and she brought two lovely friends with her. They were adorable. The woman, Ann, has an essential tremor too and it was neat to meet someone who has grown up with it the way I have and has a sense of humour about it. Very much women to admire.
Then I talked to my Aunt Liz about what's going on with Gramma and about Catie moving out and I had an epiphany.
I don't know how many times I've been asked how I keep sane with all the trauma I've had in my life. How could I not with the amazing examples of admirable women in my life?
To name a few;
Gramma; A woman who defined family so much that my friends call her "Gramma" and go to visit her. She taught me to count my blessings, not my bothers. She taught me that love is unconditional.
Mum: Yeah we have our issues but my mother taught me that the business world is not a man's domain. She taught me women can do whatever they convince themselves they can do and look fabulous doing it.
Aunt Liz: A woman who has so much love that she is the rock of our family and has always been there for any of her nieces and nephews. A woman who never passed the physical for "Mother" but has been one for all of us for years. She taught me that the word "Mother" is flexible.
Aunt Lynette: A woman who dealt with her husband's issues with love, patience and downright stubbornness. She taught me that love can conquer all.
My sis-in-law: A woman who faced physical disability with structure and discipline. She taught me that no matter what people say about you, It's what you say about yourself that counts in the end.
My big sis: She taught me that as long as children grow up knowing they are unconditionally loved by at least one person, they can survive any childhood trauma.
Lynne and Deb: They taught me the meaning of true friends. Also that it doesn't matter what happens in the past, you are in charge of your future.
Lisa and Val: Rock chicks never die. They have taught me to hold on to the joy of being young, no matter how old you get.
Katie: Taught me that Life is what you make it and you have to take responsibility for that. Also that women can have an IQ higher than your rent and still be sexy and street smart.
Darla: Taught me that being vulnerable is not a weakness and it's okay to lean on others when you have to. It takes a strong person to know when they need help.
Ivy, Lillian, Natasha, Ingrid, Debra, Tina, (Jean, honorary) Samantha, and the whole crew from the Vergs, taught me that women can do anything when they band together. We are strength in numbers.
Sarah (Derek's): Taught me that women need other women in their lives, you face challenges everyday in your life and with good friends, each and everyone of them can be met.
Lois: There is nothing a woman cannot do if she makes up her mind to do it. A woman who turned her whole life upside down and made it one worth living. She taught me that you don't have to accept limits.
Janie: Taught me that physical limits can't make you have psychological limits. Cancer is a word, an illness, not a frame of mind.
Aunt Elta and Debbie: Taught me social responsibility, and how to be a strength to my family when they are hurting, a support when they are striving.
Yvonne: I'm still learning from. She has taught me that with love, a sense of humour and duty there is nothing I can't survive.
Mary-Ann: Taught me that if you don't live your life honestly then you cannot complain about not being happy. It may not be easy but it's worth it.
MM's mom: There is nothing wrong with discipline in your life and raising your children. You are not setting limits for them, just boundaries to make them feel secure until they learn to stretch them.
Jenny, Catie, Sarah, Samantha, Ashley, Cassie, Christine; These are my daughters friends and the next generation of amazing women. Each of these girls have met some major challenges in the young lives and each have not only overcome but thrived. They are an example of what women can be, should be and will be. I'm so proud to know them all and consider them part of my family.
There are just so many more I can name in my life. Each one of these women and the many more in my life have made me like and accept the chick in the mirror. With heroines like this in my life, not to mention the many men who make my world wonderful, how can I ever say Life is too Hard?
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